This is a dippi from what I wrote for appa when he retired. I am also posting this to thank Arvind so much for the feedback and edits. Appa was proud :)
“intha nutpam porkum puriyavillai…”…
“moongil kaatril thedidum pozhuthu moongil kadendru”…
” kavithai variyin suvai…artham puriyum varai”
Everyone understands nostalgia and how music can recreate the whole situation including sights and smells. For me some of these songs brings about euphoria; that even falling in love or independence or success could not bring out. Memories of good old days, chilly cold Coimbatore breeze, half open window, TSC1296 grey Fiat carrying a happy family of four. Three hours prior to that I would have been torn away from my group of friends with whom I had been playing hop scotch or lahori until my feet and dress both attained unrecognizable colours. Amma would have battled to turn me into a presentable form after talking to appa on the phone “kozhanthaigala ready a iruka sollu ipadi ingeyavathu poitu varlam” After a terrific dinner and an even better dessert at Kwality Walls, on race course road, Madhu and I would hear the magical words, “Drive anyone?” and we would race through avinashi road or race course listening to ARRahman. On most of his Kuruchi days ,appa would drop us back and head back to work
Appa is retiring this month. In amma’s words, “Ithudan State bank Ithihasam mudinjachu” Madhu and I almost grew up with State Bank of India, like how my mom and dad did. We had, Neyveli branch days, MRL Manali days, GMO Secretariat days, SIDCO Kuruchi days, Inspection days, Zonal office days and Stressed assets management branch days. I have left out a few, maybe Ganapathy ADB and his former branches only because I was not born then or they did not have any memories for me. All the state bank days were excellent. From our family friends, to people who knew how my dad and mom met, some very special people are from the bank. My dad’s best friends, Rajaram uncle, Sam uncle, Padma aunty are all family now.
Amma and I would laugh every time appa picked up the phone when one of his superiors from work called. He would immediately stand to an attention and the number of sirs would increase tenfold. If it was someone he respected more than just as a senior, We would also be asked to remain silent and the TV and Mixie were a strict no for another half hour.
When he yelled at us or got frustrated with us, I would think, poor colleagues of his, I can just imagine what they must be going through. Turns out that it’s not true at all. It seems that his people skills are so good that everyone knows him a tough but sincere person. What I observed of appa was that he was dedicated, sincere and really hardworking.
Not so absorbed that he would neglect his family. Here comes the best part. If I were to mark places that I have visited in India, most of the map would be covered. We went on vacations on every single holiday. Be it bank funded (LFC) or appa funded, we would have a ball. From snow covered himachal, to kanyakumari and Trivandrum, we have covered it all. Wherever we go, Madhu and I have been princesses.
Thinking back, I am not sure if my dad could altogether afford the luxury or the time he gave us. At the end of the day, he has a happy family (knock on wood) and made a great career for himself. But that’s the rosy picture the princess got. Being in the rat race myself, I know my dad had a rocky ride and tough decisions to make. Living without his family in remote corners of India like Kargil and Drass, or Lucknow or Jaipur for five years is definitely not all fun. And when he came home during his “halting time”, the only question his second daughter would ask was “Enaku ena vangindu vantha?” Well he has never once disappointed me.
Again, biking from Annanagar to MRL manali would definitely not have been easy, but he would come back and ask,”Night show anyone?”
These are some of the very few struggles that I have noticed. Or rather noticed only when I look back. He just did not stress us too much with his career or with his disappointments. I have a lot to learn from my dad, but I think the most important lesson to learn from him is how to balance one's career and family. Hats off to thirty-seven years of service and hats off to twenty nine years of marital bliss.
